By Jon Beaty
There’s a lot of interpersonal conflict in my life. What about yours?
Conflict is not a new challenge—it’s woven into the fabric of human existence. From petty squabbles to deep-seated disputes, we all experience moments where our desires clash with those of others. But what if conflict could become a pathway to something greater? In Philippians 2:1-8, the Apostle Paul taps into a transformative truth: selfish ambition divides, but a heart aligned with Christ unites. By placing Jesus at the center of our conflicts, we can move beyond division and embrace a unity that reflects His love.
The Reality of Conflict
Conflict is a universal experience. As a child, I remember bickering with my younger brother over who got to sit in the front seat of the car—a small battle that felt monumental at the time. Years later, as a newlywed, my wife Tami and I would debate whether to take an evening walk together or let me sink into the couch with the TV remote. After we bought our first new home, I found myself in a tense standoff with our neighbor over when—or if—we’d build a fence between our properties. These moments, though minor, reveal a deeper truth about human nature: we’re wired to pursue our own interests.
For the past 30 years, I’ve served as an elder in several Seventh-day Adventist
churches, and I’ve seen this dynamic play out on a larger scale. Church conflicts—whether over decisions, priorities, or personalities—can strain relationships and threaten to fracture communities. Yet, beneath these struggles lie universal human needs driving our actions:
• Status: The desire for authority and admiration.
• Belonging: The longing to be accepted into relationships.
• Connecting: The need for love and emotional bonding.
• Resources: The accumulation of money, property, food and other essentials.
• Safety and Security: The ability to protect ourselves and all of the above.
We naturally look to fulfill these needs through our interactions with others, often focusing on what we can gain. When our interests collide with the interests of others, conflict appears.
Leaders have an added responsibility to discern what is in the best interests of others, which may conflict with the leader’s own interests.
But there’s hope beyond this cycle—a hope rooted in the example of Jesus.
Christ’s Model for Unity
The Bible traces conflict back to its cosmic origin: a struggle between Christ and Satan. It began when Lucifer, craving God’s status and worship, rebelled in heaven. His defiance swayed a third of the angels and spilled into humanity through Adam and Eve’s fall, setting the stage for every messy conflict since. This is the backdrop against which Paul writes to the Philippians, offering a blueprint for unity that counters the divisive pull of selfish ambition.
In Philippians 2:1-8, Paul urges us, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves” (Philippians 2:3 NLT). He points to Jesus as the ultimate model. Though equal with God, Jesus didn’t cling to His divine privileges. Instead, He set aside His rightful status, took on the form of a servant, and gave His life for us (Philippians 2:6-8). This act of humility wasn’t weakness—it was strength, redefining how we approach conflict. Where selfish ambition tears us apart, Christ’s selflessness draws us together.
The sanctuary offers a beautiful symbol of this unity. The seven-branched lampstand, crafted from a single piece of gold, stood in the Hebrew Tabernacle with its branches united at one base. The gold represented Jesus’ righteous character. Each branch drew oil from the same source, shining as one light, symbolizing the fruit of the Holy Spirit. So, it is with Christ’s church: though we are many, in Him we are united, drawing life and strength from the same Savior. This is the unity Jesus models—a unity that doesn’t erase our differences but binds us through His self-giving love.
Practical Steps Toward Unity
So, how do we live this out? It starts with a shift in where we seek fulfillment. Our core needs—status, belonging, connection, resources, and safety—find their truest satisfaction in Christ. When we anchor ourselves in Him, we no longer need to fight for these things from others. Knowing we’re loved and accepted by God frees us to approach conflicts with grace rather than demands.
“And a servant of the Lord must not quarrel but be gentle to all, able to teach, patient, in humility correcting those who are in opposition, if God perhaps will grant them repentance, so that they may know the truth, and that they may come to their senses and escape the snare of the devil, having been taken captive by him to do his will.” (2 Timothy 2:24-26 NKJV).
By God’s grace, these are the practical steps I want to follow to embody this unity:
• Find fulfillment in Christ: Instead of chasing validation or resources from people, rest in God’s abundant provision. Our worth isn’t tied to what others think—it’s secure in Him.
• Let God’s acceptance free me to extend grace: When we’re rooted in God’s love, we can forgive and understand others, even in disagreement. We don’t need to win every battle with words, because true victory is won by representing the likeness of Christ’s character.
• Follow Jesus’ example of humble service: Let’s give others greater honor to others than we give ourselves, serving with the same humility Christ showed. In Christ’s kingdom first place goes to those who choose to serve themselves last.
These steps don’t end conflict, but they transform how we navigate it. By Christ at the center of our lives, we turn clashes into opportunities for growth and connection.
A Vision of Unity
Jesus prayed for this, and the Holy Spirit works for this: A church where unity isn’t just a goal but a living reality. Picture a community where:
• Disagreements draw us closer as we practice mutual humility.
• We’re quick to listen, giving others space to be heard.
• We’re slow to speak, choosing words that heal rather than wound.
• We’re eager to forgive, letting go of grudges to embrace reconciliation.
This isn’t a church without conflict—it’s a church with Christ at the center of it. Here, the focus shifts from winning arguments to building relationships. It’s a community that mirrors Jesus’ love, shining as a beacon of hope in a divided world. This is the unity He longs for His people—a unity that doesn’t ignore our struggles but overcomes them through His grace.